My God,
Thou hast helped me to see, that whatever good be in honour and rejoicing, how good is he who gives them, and can withdraw them; that blessedness does not lie so much in receiving good from and in thee, but in holding forth thy glory and virtue; that is an amazing thing to see Deity in a creature, speaking, acting, filling, shinning through it; that nothing is good but thee, that I am near good when I am near thee, that to be like thee is a glorious thing: This is my magnet, my attraction.
Thou art all my good in times of peace, my only support in days of trouble, my one sufficiency when life shall end.
Help me to see how good thy will is in all, and even when it crosses mine teach me to pleased with it. Grant me to feel thee in fire, and food and every providence, and to see that thy many gifts and creatures are, but thy hands and fingers taking hold of me.
Thou bottomless fountain of all good, I give to myself to thee out of love, for all I have or own is thine, my goods, family, church, self, to do with as thou wilt, to honour thyself by me, and by all mine.
If it be consistent with thy eternal counsels, the purpose of thy grace, and the great ends of thy glory, then bestow upon me the blessings of thy comforts; If not let me resign myself to thy wiser determinations.
- A Prayer from the Valley of Vision: The All-Good
The year is almost coming to a close. Here I am sitting at home, looking out the window and thinking. Thinking on what it would be like if I was a stranger peaking in the window of this house and listening to the happenings inside of these walls. I would like to think that one would see a simple life, albeit filled with busy work; and one would hear cries and laughter, and talks of trials and triumphs.
Sadly, if I were blindly looking into my own life this year, I would probably say that this was a terrible year. (Imagine losing two cars, emergent repairs to an old house, unforeseen expenditures, not having enough time to finish work, to talk, to spend quality time with your spouse-- that was the running theme of 2010.) To be perfectly honest, maintaining a marriage, a home, a job, not to mention family and friendships, proved to be very challenging for me this year. I know this holds true for my husband too, who continues to stay strong in finishing grad school.
The strange thing is that if I were to look clearly at this year, the things that made it terrible are really quite remarkable events. Through each and every trial, God has compassionately taken off my blindfold so that I could see His work in my life. He was working all along: through our caring parents, our brothers and sisters, our friends and neighbors, our co-workers and classmates, and most of all at church service -- all there with loving support, always ready to lend a helping hand. (Imagine that God is even at work when we call on our plumbers and mechanics. No joke.)
Looking inside the heart of my home, I am humbled by our Father's goodness to an often times undeserving child. So as I sit here, waiting... I'd like to think that this place is the little house where All-Good resides. I think that 2010 will go down in my book as a terribly good year.
Love,
Michelle
